1st attempt at FSH IUI failed and more bad news about ovaries
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1st attempt at FSH IUI failed and more bad news about ovaries Expand / Collapse

6/11/2013 1:04 PM
Hi bmiller, thank you so much for your thoughtful reply. It's amazing how much comfort one can get from a perfect stranger who is going through the same struggles. It's really good to know that the ED is working out for you (twins!!), it gives me a little hope.

6/2/2013 10:53 AM
dgaut002 - I know your feelings on the child not being your biological child, I too struggled with this. I just Married in March of 2012 to my husband who has never had children. I then was 43 and wanted desperately to give him a child. We tried for only a few months on our own and one IUI, then went straight to IVF. Did great on the meds but only retrieved 9 eggs and only 2 made it to day 3. We transferred anyway with no success. So they too suggested donor eggs, we talked about it and really hated the idea but knew we really didn't have the money to try me one more time and then have to do DE. I look at like this, I am caring the babies and they are biologically my husbands. But not sure if you ever heard that when you raise the child they do get all of your characteristics and believe it or not they eventually start to even look like you and people will say he/she looks just like you. I have a daughter that was given to me from a previous marriage when she was 8 months old and she is no blood what so ever and is 17 now. But all of her life people have told her, you look just like your Mamma and we just look at each other and smile and say yes she does. Even her attitude is the same... Sometimes not such a good thing LOL... But we did the donor egg and are now 14 weeks pregnant with twins could not be happier. So just always keep positive and you will not regret it. Good Luck to you...

5/29/2013 7:36 AM
Hi, I read the original post to this thread and want to give my 2 cents. I see that the post was from way back in March, so first I would like to know what you decided and how you are doing?

I'm 38 now and, along with my husband, have been trying to have a family for 3 years. I had 3 miscarriages and went through many many tests and never found anything wrong me. In fact, the doctor used the word "beautiful" to describe my uterus, my egg reserve, and my response to fertility meds. However after several rounds of super-ovulation and IUI, I wasn't even able to get pregnant at all. My doc concluded that my eggs are probably poor quality and recommended IVF with embryo biopsy to try to hone in on only my good eggs. I was not convinced I had any good eggs at this point, so we opted for egg donation instead of spending the money on that extra IVF step that will probably not work and then have to pay for egg donation anyway. Long story to get to my point, sorry! The mental process I went through to finally accept our decision was not easy and my fear was not being able to "relate" to my child, being not genetically related, if we were successful. For example, I absolutely love sports and am very athletic...which is definitely genetic...and it makes me sad to think about raising a child who isn't. However, all the signs pointed to egg donation. I'm by no means a perfect genetic human specimen (after all I AM infirtile) and an egg donor's genes could produce an offspring with traits that surprise me and are different than mine in a good way (after all, she is compassionate enough to want to donate eggs). I also really thought deeply about why I want a family in the first place. It's not because I want a little kid that looks like me and acts like me and people can sit around saying "Oh, she has your eyes!". It's because I want to pass on my values, knowledge, everything I've learned in life to make me the person I've become through experience, the lessons I've learned both through failure and success, and also love. I have a giant hole in my heart that I feel can only be filled by the love a mother has for her child and what hopefully the child has for her. Finally, I want all these things to live on in my child after I'm dead. So, um, all of these thoughts sort of make the kid's genetic make-up seem pretty insignificant! Anyway, after 6 months of waiting we are set to go as soon as our donor starts her cycle.

I'd love to hear what others have to say, please post!!

3/9/2013 7:26 PM
Too soon to give up, sweets! Look around on the web and you'll find fsh is just a number. Give it a couple more tries or get a new RE with some new protocol. I'm in the same boat as you-still waiting for follies to develop. But I'm not ruling out ED. It's yours, you gave those cells life-you and your hubby. You would be the biological mom. I've read what some others have written about DE and its heartwarming. But give it another try anyway! Chin up and keep me posted

3/6/2013 12:41 AM
Feeling defeated. Always more bad news about what my body cannot do, isn't doing, etc. We have our next steps planned but not feeling optimistic about it. Also found out IVF would not be any better because my FSH level is high (18). I know it is just our 1st cycle but...feeling hopeless. Dr suggested donor eggs might be a possibility if our next steps do not work but I feel so disconnected from that idea. Even if we pick a donor close to my description...not feeling like it would be "our" child. So right now I am really against that option.
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